For you, a thousand times over 

Texting back Kunal, Roohi was fidgeting out of concern. It had been two months since Kunal had last told her about the toxic work culture at his firm where he had been working over time every single day to make up for the lack of human resources. 
"Kunal, you need to realize that being understaffed is not your fault."

"I get it Roohi, I have been part of the hiring drive. The budget versus candidate requirements are insanely mismatched." Kunal was losing his patience.

"Have you given any thought to switching over somewhere else, where your talent might get the recognition it deserves?" Roohi added suggestively knowing how hard he had been working and how close he was inching to a total burnout.

"And how exactly would that show up on my character? That I too left the sinking ship like everyone else?" One of Kunal's vice, was that he was too loyal for his own good.

"I just don't want you to reach a point of burnout where you lose all interest in work because of how unrecognized and under appreciated you feel. " Roohi had been pickig up on the changed vibe and wanted to give Kunal a heads-up.

"Roohi, I don't say it often but I'm scared. I am,. . . . .  things are risky, the firm is nearing a collapse and the way I see it, I can no longer make up for the empty chairs. Too many people have left, and it's too much to handle. I barely have time to eat dinner with my family, not to mention the drained energy leaving me no social life on my only day off." 

"Then why are you putting yourself through this torture Kunal? "

"Responsibilities Roohi. I cannot back out of a toxic workplace like you did. I don't have the courage, nor the means. For the sake of my family, I might even live the life of a slave forever."

"Kunal you are an idiot. You cannot do that! We'll figure out something, and you take a break and some rest in the meanwhile"

Sitting now at the coffee table, putting away her phone, Roohi channeled all her attention to her date. Karan was on time and just as handsome as his pictures even while sporting a bed head look. They both ordered some food and sipped on their coffee when Karan remarked on the beautiful crown tattoo on Roohi's arm.

"Yeah, I liked the idea, plus I had always been a fan of body art so I went ahead and got one" Roohi smiled as Karan admired her choice of body art and location. He went ahead and rolled up his sleeaves to reveal an entire arm filled with verses and the words mom dad written with hearts drawn around them. Roohi looked at the entirety of the body art piece, and took a few minutes to completely absorb the details of it, reading through the words with careful consideration. Almost as if chewing each word to fully capture the taste it seemed. Karan found it a little unnerving, but he knew she was a fan of art and body art both, so he went on to describe the experience and story behind it to her anyway.

"I got it done around 4-5 years back. The verse really caught my attention and I though I need it on me."

"And the love mom dad ? Too cheesy don't you think. " Roohi made a face to show amusement, which went unreciprocated. "I mean I would never ever get anything like that written on me, EVER"

"I do love them, and would do anything for them. It's okay if you would'nt, everyone has a right of choice to their body, and you probably have your own reasons. I respect that " Karan was serious, and so was his expression for love of his parents. Roohi was not exactly sure, and they both steered the conversion towards their shared interest in art and photography instead. 

Later in the night, sitting on her bed, Roohi could not help her thoughts from steering back to the day and the conversations she had with Kunal and Karan. 

It had only been a few months since Roohi had first made any contact in over two decades with her estranged mother and was coming to terms with her relationship with her parents and her lack of emotional attachment to either one of them. And here she was with people her age, who would go to any lengths out of love for their parents. Karan was opinionated and yet he was willing to forego all logic if it meant appeasing his parents. Kunal was no different as he would rather choose of a life of misery, foregoing his passion and creativity than let his parents know of any of it.

Roohi fought her intrusive thoughts that made her feel emotionally unavailable towards her parents as she was not even trying to reconcile with either of them. Instead she was simply making peace with the sheer human ness of their being and learning to coexist. Going in circles was making her head spin, and she forgot her green tea had gone cold sitting on the window sill in front of her as she stared into the oblivion of the skyline visible through her window. Getting up, she put away the cup and came back to her cupboard to put on her night dress before going to bed, and one of the scarves her grandma had decorated fell out of the cupboard. Picking it up, Roohi caressed the fabric against her face and was reminded of the numerous times she would do that while her grandma would sit in the courtyard working diligently on the fabric with her weak eyesight and aged hands. She used to say, she wanted to leave something wearable for her when she's old enough to be a bride. 

In that instant it hit Roohi, she wasn't cold hearted or unemotional, she did respect her parents and cared about them too. She loved her grandma and for her she could have, much like the kite runner gone ahead and said, "For you, a thousand times over". Putting her anxious thoughts to rest, and accepting the difference of opinion between herself and that of the people in her life whom she valued, Roohi went back to bed, holding onto the scarf, taking pictures with it and calling it a night. 

Not everybody is dealt with the same cards, and not everyone has to play the same way. What matters is the acceptance of differences and respect for varying opinion to live in harmony. Neither Kunal, or Karan or Roohi are right or wrong in how they love and what oceans they're willing or unwilling to cross for those they love. Life doesn't have a standard operating procedure.

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